"Where Tragedy Confronts Eternity"

I seem to be lagging behind a lot of folks I know who have had the life changing experience of reading "The Shack" by William P. Young.

If you wish to give yourself a gift....a gift that could last longer than a life time....read this book.

If you do, it will be a gift to me, too.

FAMILY

Family. It’s funny word isn’t it? It holds such mystery, such complexity. It might mean the group into which one is born. It might mean the group into which one is adopted. And it might mean the group into which one marries.
It also might mean none of those….but the group in which one chooses to reside.
Family is one of my favorite concepts.
I observed my mother as her children married. I watched her double the number of her children without so much as a skipped beat. I’ve often said that if you were with her in a room with all ten of us you’d be hard pressed to determine which of the five were born to her and which had become her children through marriage.
When I married, I garnered another father. I loved and was loved by an additional grandfather and grandmother. I added aunts, cousins and uncles.
And then my own children began to bring others into our small family. And I gave my heart over to them. They were important to my child, therefore, by some mystical force, they became important to me. It was the force that doubled and then tripled my mother-love. Eventually I had not three but six children. And I would give my life for any one of them. And my blessings were doubled. And even better, their families came too. Frances is a sister. Sue and Terry are far more than “in-laws” to us. What a joy “family” brings!
It was this concept that led us to gather at my brother, Chick’s house to celebrate – to rejoice in “family”. Family as we remember it. Family before our rememberings. Family as it is now.
For over 100 years the Roushey family had held reunions. As a child I used to be overwhelmed by all the “family” I had. I didn’t know a large percentage of them…but I knew their blood ran in my veins, or that they were connected to me in some way. It expanded my world, it connected me and warmed me, and made me curious to know more about my family, my world.
My maternal Grandfather, Bradner J. Roushey was gleeful at these reunions. His giggle was easy, his eyes lit up, he was all smiles. Because of him, I caught the “bug” and relished the communion of these annual events.
Later on, we began to gather to celebrate the life and family of my maternal Grandmother, Gweney Thomas Roushey. We attempted to meet on a date close to her birthday in September. My mother and her siblings wanted to pass along the history of our family, the story of our past, the love of the present and the hope of the future.

So, after bidding a fond farewell to Linda and Bob, we set out for Nanticoke PA. The day was gorgeous, sun, sun and more sun.
It was to be the first time I’d seen my brother’s house and it is charming and it is set upon a wonderful, reunion-perfect lot. With plenty of room for volley ball – which I played (badly) with the kids, and a new horse shoe pit, along with a large lawn on which to sit and chat it is a perfect location! Adding in the amazing “catering” of Noy, girlfriend of Chick’s youngest son Brian, and the home made ice cream made by Brian, you’ve got the perfect reunion. Later in the day Chick and his friend arrived with the most delicious and the largest fruit tray I have ever seen. No one lacked for anything to eat and enjoy.
Noy was disappointed in the poor attendance – she had cooked so many delights. But I for one was heartened at the young people who did attend. The interest in family has not died out. In fact, one nephew, Will, came without his wife Tina, Carol’s daughter who had another commitment! What a confirmation of family.
Later, when gifts were picked, it was interesting to me to see who received which family pictures which were wrapped and unidentified. It seemed so directed….I received a picture Colleen had sent last year of hubby Larry and our son Larry. Sue (Bill’s wife) received a picture of Chick and Bill I had taken when they were very little boys, dressed up like tiny versions of Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid – cap guns and all! Will got the double framed picture of Mom and Dad on their wedding day, along with their marriage license. His reaction told me no one would have appreciated it more. Carol chose a picture I’d provided of our Great Grandparents. The pictures led to a great deal of conversation.
Later, as has happened before, some took time to peruse the family tree chart I have been working on for years. A few new additions have been made since last year, in the Roushey branch…namely the Goetschi family back to 1554 in Switzerland.
I was especially touched by the time Chick took to show his friend the family tree, explaining who was who, and the fact that he was named for our Uncle Lew.
After a heart warming, leisurely time spent just hanging out, eating and talking, we decided it was time to think about taking our leave. We said that we would follow Bill and Sue and Carol and Elmer to Warrior Run to see what was left of the old school recently razed on the firehouse property.
That gave the six of us an opportunity to have a little more time to chat and to see Bill’s firehouse. And then we made the drive home.
Family. It had once more fed my soul, and reminded me of just how much I love these people, some of whom share my history and some of whom have just heard about it as they make their own.

Lions and Tigers and Bears Oh My!

Sunday dawned with better weather but still hot and sticky and I still wasn't breathing well with the humidity, so we pulled out our best option. Not the zoo....but animals nevertheless. We took 7 year old Julia to the Wild Safari at Great Adventure.

Driving through in the air conditioned car was a great choice! And with animals on either side, Julia was all over the back seat and constant "oh Wow!"s and sudden gasps of delight were flying. She took time to read many of the signs along the way, explaining what each animal is, fun facts about them. I think she was especially taken by the giraffes. And they came near the car and put on a show for her. We don't have many snap shots of the trip, but I have a full dvd of it. We haven't seen it yet, but I am hoping for a nice video diary for her.

At the end of the safari there is a shady and educational oasis for kids. I had packed fresh fruit, yogurt and beverages, and there were shaded picnic tables on which to enjoy a cool snack. Then we saw exhibits and she rode a pony named Licorace. She had brought a book on horses and ponies to read in the car and the book had pointed out that Shetlands are the best for children to ride. She was distinctly disapproving of the fact that the ponies they had provided were not the right ones! But she enjoyed the ride anyway.

It was a long day.....Julia was contented and fell asleep in the car on the way home. We felt we had done a good job!

Julia's Day Out

We had taken Thursday and Friday off from work in order to have time to take both Larry and Julia out for separate trips.

However, my piano was to be delivered right in the middle of the day on Thursday
so we used that day for various chores we had lined up. Friday was Larry's day in Philadelphia, Saturday was to be Jules' day. But since we had planned a day at the zoo and the humidity was something like a million, storms were in and out, we opted instead to take her out to breakfast and then hoped for better weather for Sunday.

We gave our girl her choice from several and she picked Cracker Barrel for breakfast. She had an enormous serving of pancakes with cherries and syrup, bacon, and tried biscuits and gravy for the first time. She declared she loved them!

We explained to her that weather permitting, she would get our continued attentions the next day.

Cradle of Liberty

We love coming up with trips with our Grandkids in order to spend quality time with them, yet interesting - possibly educational - and very fun. Larry and Julia are really the only ones we've been able to do it with as yet....Ian being so young, and our Jessica being so far. But we hold out hope to have it be something we can do with all of them at some point. Yesterday was Larry 4's turn. We chose Philadelphia history for him.

Living so near the birth place of our nation, we wanted to share more of it with him.

The day was gorgeous, although hot!!!

We set out from Woodcrest train station at about 9:45 AM and for the next 7 hours or so, we had a terrific time learning and laughing.
We hit the Visitor's Center first and as we exited a movie presentation young Larry and I both locked eyes with other family members! We all sort of stood in shock for a moment. There were Aunt Rita Hamilton, her daughter Rita and her son, Jim with his two boys. You could not possibly plan to meet that way! We had a few minutes' reunion and then we parted ways. We thought! Later in the day as we were enjoying Bains' sandwiches at the Bourse, the whole family came in and we sat at adjoining tables. Later, after Jim and boys had left for home, we encountered the Ritas one more time in Franklin Square - one of my absolute favorites spots in Philly. Franklin - what a fascinating mind!

We met up with two ladies I think were sisters as we stood in line at Independence Hall. We were discussing Franklin - and I was recommending they be sure to visit the Square. I was recalling all his inventions - and how amazing it was that he thought of things that he did. Where did he get his ideas? The one lady said "Aliens!" The other replied, "he invented Aliens?" We had a good laugh at that. (do you think he might have?)

Larry we hope you had as much fun as we did!

My Friend - My Self

I was taken by surprise at the sharp minds of both my cousins. Not only did they recount many memories of the past – that is one thing we tend to retain as age increases – but they were just as sharp and clear on the present. In fact, Jane was remarkable in the exacting directions she had given us on getting to Elizabeth. If you know us, you will know of course we didn’t quite follow them so it was a very good thing we had both the Googled print-outs as well as a very good Pennsylvania map! After leaving Elizabeth we felt it might be good to try harder to follow her directions and I called Linda too, to be sure we had a fairly clear idea what we were doing.

It was a nice day for travel. I was, as usual, “plugged in” and purring with being in the mountains. There is something maternal in them for me. Everything was green; the sky was very like that in the UK – lots of overcast grey and mist, but only one hard rain storm we’d hit early in the day. We had sun from time to time, but we kept thinking of Ft. William in Scotland.

Driving through the various Pennsylvania towns kept taking me back to my days with Aunt Mar. Towns in which she had shopped, had friends, had doctors, paid bills. I always hear their names in my head in her voice.

So far that day I had eaten one can of SlimFast, one bite of a scone, some coffee, a banana and a few sips of a root-beer float that the staff at Jane’s home had brought in for Jane and me. I’d had a few sips and saved the rest for Larry who had gone out to the car for a while. He had some yogurt out there, sat in the car and enjoyed the day and the view of the farm. So at this point he had had breakfast, the majority of the scone, a banana, coffee, the root-beer float and some yogurt. It was getting on to seven o’clock and we were ready for a meal! We assumed Linda and Bob had gone ahead and eaten, perhaps saving us some leftovers. However, when we arrived at their lovely home about an hour later, we discovered they had waited for us! Bob had had a fire burning in the ring out back, it had been put out by a passing storm and he had relit it. We were all pretty quickly out there grilling hotdogs over the open flame and catching up would wait until we had all eaten.

Linda and I have such a bond of friendship. She was the teacher who took over Aunt Mar’s class when my dear Aunt retired. They were very close. As Aunt Mar aged, Linda was there for her….and for me. I was just too far away to be of any good when she needed me. I began to think of Linda as almost an appendage of myself. When she would be at the elderly lady’s bedside, I would almost feel I was beside her. We were both so devoted to my aunt and loved her so deeply. And we both still grieve her. We both carry such joy that we were part of her life, and such sorrow that she is gone. And I think we both feel an attachment to each other in so many ways. That kind of friendship is such a blessing!

After dinner, we four sat outside cooking marshmallows and beginning the process of catching up.

It would not be an exaggeration to say that Larry and I could easily just move in to Bob and Linda’s home! Not only is it welcoming and warm to visit, but there is so much about the house and the property that makes us both feel so at home.

There are, of course, the prerequisite mountains for me, but there is the wonderful garden of corn, tomatoes, green beans, peas, onions, squash, zucchini, cucumbers, rutabagas and more, plus flowers everywhere. Larry simply drools over the colorful flower beds and pots everywhere you look. He envies the garden. In as much as we get almost no sun on our property, we can’t even think about gardens. But it is lovely to visit friends, enjoy the sight, relish the produce, and leave again – no weeding involved! Each time we have been to their house Larry has come away convinced that “next year” he will put in for a garden plot at Barclay Farmstead. Maybe once we’ve retired.

Back in Time For the Future part 2

Next, on to Susquehanna PA – nearly NY – to the facility where my mother’s cousin Elizabeth Page (nee Thomas ) lives. Elizabeth is 95. She is the daughter of my Grandmother’s brother Lewis John Thomas. He was married to Elizabeth Lewis. So Elizabeth would have been Mrs. Elizabeth Lewis Lewis-Thomas or something like that! Elizabeth and I have had a 25 or 30 year correspondence. We have spoken on the telephone a few times. We’ve met at a few family gatherings. At those gatherings she seemed always to gravitate to my sister Carol, and I have always wondered if she thought she was writing and talking with Carol!
Driving up and parking beside the home gave us some bad moments. In contrast to Jane’s home, Elizabeth’s is an old, somewhat run-down house with a long extension built on to the rear. I was so fearful, as I know Larry was of what we would find inside.
It was not as bad as we feared, but I do see it as a terrible fire trap and hope that never comes to pass.
We found Elizabeth well and contented. When asked if she is happy there, she shrugged and said, “well, I’m as happy as I would be anywhere.”
Elizabeth very strongly resembles her cousin, my aunt, Martha. Her mannerisms are very similar.
We sat and chatted quite some time and she showed us many photos of her grandchildren and so forth. Near the end of the visit she pulled out an old black and white photo. “Here’s my dad” says she. I almost fell over! I’ve never seen a picture of my grandmother that young, and here was her brother perhaps in his 30’s – along with Elizabeth who looks to be 8 or 9 or so. I will check out the dates and some point. See how old they each were at that point.
I asked if she had more such pictures. Oh, well, she replied, I used to. But when I had to put my house up for sale, everything happened so quickly that they were boxed up and burned. (Can you hear me gasping?) But, she added, I did salvage one box full. I don’t know where they are right now. But no one cares about them. They’ll just go too one of these days. !!!!!!!!!!!!!
In such a situation, those of us with this genetic weakness come to a parting of sensibility, common decency and absolute panic. How to stop the madness?!
I attempted to impress upon her the terror in my heart that such priceless memories should be lost to those of us, now and hopefully in the future, who care. I hinted at borrowing the pictures in order to scan them. But her reply was to “harrumph” that no one would ever be interested. I got nowhere. I did at least manage to take a photo of the photo. It could very well be the last we see of it or the others somewhere in a box.
(insert the sound of a breaking heart) I promised that should she decide to share them, I would happily pay postage, shipping etc., and/or go up to get them. Didn’t make much impression however.
Finally we decided we’d best call it a day and get off for New Milford PA. We were expected for dinner at my friend’s house. Elizabeth had held up well despite the fact that she had had visitors earlier in the day. Cousins from Florida had been in the area and had stopped in. I don’t believe she gets many visitors – too bad they had to happen all on the same day.