Photo Finish

Just have a few last shots from Christmas forward to this past week to sort of finish up the past year. Above, the first Christmas cookies I've baked in some years. Just don't seem to have the energy and am always afraid I'll eat them!

It all began with these babies! I thought I'd seen on facebook that daughter-in-law Colleen, otherwise known as our Christmas Day Hostess with the Mostest liked the recipe for these Irish Bailey Cream, Irish Whiskey, and Guiness cupcakes - nicknamed Carbomb Cupcakes. I almost never bake anymore. I miss baking but it usually results in either too many calories hanging about, or something that takes more time than I generally have. But for Colleen - for Christmas - it was worth a try!

Once I'd got the cupcakes done, we realized there would be nothing for the kids. So Lar whipped out his trusty gingerbread man pan and made a brownie-man for them. And then we were off the Larry and Colleen's for a fabulous family dinner. Desserts in hand.

Fast forward to second week in January and we got pretty well buried in 6 - 8 inches of snow. It was gorgeous the way it stuck to everything....tree branches, bushes, - gorgeous but heavy!

And last but certainly not least! Our powerful buddy that helps us not be afraid of all that snow anymore!

New Year

The New Year, 2011 has certainly hit with powerful changes. In fact, mid way through the first month I am exhausted, saddened, hopeful, grieving, thankful, all at once.
In last year’s May I made an unfortunate decision to remain in my job when my boss retired. I thought I was doing the right thing for us and for the department and new boss. Thought I had the chops to continue to actually do my job. Thought my experience would serve to support the new boss as he adjusted. Thought employment, with insurance, was best for us. Thought, somehow it might be far too soon to give up working.
I was wrong on all counts.
It’s a long story, but I’ll just say that my employers were not at all happy with my decision. They have been suspicious of my decision. For the first time in my life I have not been trusted. Not for anything I have done. Of that, at least, I can be sure.
Finding it difficult to live with, I made the decision after the holidays to retire.
I put in my application and felt immediate relief. I was surprised at that reaction! I had expected only sorrow and trepidation.
Proving it was the right decision, my boss, upon hearing my decision, spent about 30 minutes or more attempting to chip away at my self esteem. He also pointed out that he had not been giving me any work that he would not have felt comfortable with my reporting back to my old boss! As if I would. As if he (old boss) would be interested.
He accused me of “not getting along” with a number of people with whom I have always enjoyed a perfectly good relationship.
I knew then, with no doubt, I have made the right decision.
But I really wasn’t ready in many ways.
We have, in the last couple of weeks, had reports of health issues.
Most, if not all, can and will be dealt with – hopefully successfully. But they were shocks anyway.
One night last week when I could not sleep, I made the discovery that a cousin we had lost track of had died in 2007! Her family had never notified any of us. It was a total surprise.
Just days later I received a telephone call to report that Susan, my dear sister in law, wife of my baby brother Bill had died in her sleep. At 61, surely she was too young!
I went to work on Monday and reported our loss. No one mentioned I was entitled to funeral leave until a peer told me to check with HR. Sure enough, I was entitled to 5 days. I took off the rest of the week – 4 days – and on Wednesday, after dealing with the 6-8 inches of snow – about 2 hours or so of snow blower and shovel – we set out for Wilkes-Barre.
Our oldest and youngest sons drove up as well. I was so proud that they showed that respect for that lovely, sweet, unassuming woman. She was god-mother to our youngest.
I loved being with my siblings, nieces and nephews. My heart was torn looking at my brother…so caught unprepared. He was so sad. He was so alone. We all wanted to do something. He is sick of hearing “is there anything you need?” Yet, we all say it over and over again…wanting to be a source of help. There is no help for this but time.
Home again, we took our young granddaughter to dinner out and then back here to do homework, to chat, to watch her child’s program for bedtime. She is developing so rapidly, turning into a person that gives hints as to the beautiful, bright woman she will be.
And then, the next day, we went to observe her classroom during “special person” day. We were blown away by the amazing curriculum. We fell in love with her classmates…learning so much, along with social graces. Hope for the world.
So this year has started out with ups and downs, with heartbreak and with hope, with disappointment and with love.
This year has started with the full gamut of life.
Happy New Year!

Quilted Memories Warm the Heart

As an inveterate quilter, I tend to think of things like the fabric of life making up the warmth of a quilt. This year I decided to put this into a paper memento - a "quilt" of sorts made up with the friends and family which gave us such warmth of soul and heart during the recent holidays.